Monday
Apr112005
Menopausal dream
Monday, April 11, 2005 at 3:00AM
By Ellen Ratner
I watched every minute of the wedding of Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles. I loved it. Why? Because it is the story of my generation, the early "Baby Boomers."
We grew up in a post-World War II era of expectations and of watching "sitcoms" about an ideal world. I used to love "Father Knows Best" and "Ozzie and Harriet." I did not know at the time that 20 to 25 percent of our nation's children experienced physical and sexual abuse at the hands of family members. As far as I knew, all fathers knew and did their best for their families.
Prince Charles is product of that era as well. Although there is no known physical abuse of Charles, there certainly was a very cold royal atmosphere. I recall the famous photo of 4-year-old Prince Charles shaking hands with his mother Queen Elizabeth. I suppose that display of "affection" could be dubbed "the Royal Hug." The Royal Hug was followed by the "Royal Shove." Prince Philip sent his son off to a very harsh and cold boarding school when he was just a young boy. Not exactly a way to welcome the future king into a world of love.
The notion of mandatory royal behavior was not confined to the young prince. The queen interfered with the emotional life of her sister Princess Margaret as well. Princess Margaret wanted to marry Group Capt. Peter Townsend . Totally disapproving, the queen had the officer "re-assigned" to Belgium in 1959, and shortly thereafter Princess Margaret announced her engagement to Anthony Armstrong Jones. Her life was ruined and she was never happy.
Prince Charles clearly was in love with Camilla well before Diana was even introduced to the prince, but Camilla did not meet the queen's fancy. It was the prince's "duty" to marry a virgin capable of producing the proper royal line. Love was a luxury for commoners. Poor Diana even had to endure a "virginity" examination before her fairytale wedding to the prince.
So with no support and comfort from his parents, and married to a beautiful but equally unhappy wife, Prince Charles sought comfort from the only woman he ever loved. How many people of the early boomer generation married the people of their own religion, race or ethnic background to please their family and wound up miserable? How many of these unhappy souls visited sites such as www.classmates.com and finally reconnected with their soul mates later in life?
We grew up in a world that clung to a notion of "how the world should operate." We are driven by appearances. We grew up with a televised world of clear morals. Yet a whole a lot of shady business was happening outside the little black box. Charles and Camilla's dilemma has poked through the Hollywood sets and Patty Duke perfection that we came to know and strived to emulate. We are older now, and much wiser.
And so we toast the celebration of a true love legitimized for its authenticity and intrinsic value over appearance and pomp. The marriage of the prince and royal highness screams the real values that we should want our children to emulate – unconditional love for our children and our spouses – living and growing up in a family that really cares about its children, a family where the parents really love each other and, unlike the queen and Prince Philip, share a bed and bedroom.
I watched every minute of the wedding of Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles. I loved it. Why? Because it is the story of my generation, the early "Baby Boomers."
We grew up in a post-World War II era of expectations and of watching "sitcoms" about an ideal world. I used to love "Father Knows Best" and "Ozzie and Harriet." I did not know at the time that 20 to 25 percent of our nation's children experienced physical and sexual abuse at the hands of family members. As far as I knew, all fathers knew and did their best for their families.
Prince Charles is product of that era as well. Although there is no known physical abuse of Charles, there certainly was a very cold royal atmosphere. I recall the famous photo of 4-year-old Prince Charles shaking hands with his mother Queen Elizabeth. I suppose that display of "affection" could be dubbed "the Royal Hug." The Royal Hug was followed by the "Royal Shove." Prince Philip sent his son off to a very harsh and cold boarding school when he was just a young boy. Not exactly a way to welcome the future king into a world of love.
The notion of mandatory royal behavior was not confined to the young prince. The queen interfered with the emotional life of her sister Princess Margaret as well. Princess Margaret wanted to marry Group Capt. Peter Townsend . Totally disapproving, the queen had the officer "re-assigned" to Belgium in 1959, and shortly thereafter Princess Margaret announced her engagement to Anthony Armstrong Jones. Her life was ruined and she was never happy.
Prince Charles clearly was in love with Camilla well before Diana was even introduced to the prince, but Camilla did not meet the queen's fancy. It was the prince's "duty" to marry a virgin capable of producing the proper royal line. Love was a luxury for commoners. Poor Diana even had to endure a "virginity" examination before her fairytale wedding to the prince.
So with no support and comfort from his parents, and married to a beautiful but equally unhappy wife, Prince Charles sought comfort from the only woman he ever loved. How many people of the early boomer generation married the people of their own religion, race or ethnic background to please their family and wound up miserable? How many of these unhappy souls visited sites such as www.classmates.com and finally reconnected with their soul mates later in life?
We grew up in a world that clung to a notion of "how the world should operate." We are driven by appearances. We grew up with a televised world of clear morals. Yet a whole a lot of shady business was happening outside the little black box. Charles and Camilla's dilemma has poked through the Hollywood sets and Patty Duke perfection that we came to know and strived to emulate. We are older now, and much wiser.
And so we toast the celebration of a true love legitimized for its authenticity and intrinsic value over appearance and pomp. The marriage of the prince and royal highness screams the real values that we should want our children to emulate – unconditional love for our children and our spouses – living and growing up in a family that really cares about its children, a family where the parents really love each other and, unlike the queen and Prince Philip, share a bed and bedroom.
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